Your "Villain Era" Isn't Selfish: It's The Only Way To Save Yourself
How To Challenge Yourself When Everyone Wants You To Stay The Same?
Many people have dreams that never come true. We've all wanted to change our lives or imagined what our lives could be like when we watch planes take off or when we can no longer stand our daily routine. When we decide to change and follow our inner voice, and we want to share that change, our loved ones are often the last people to support us, either out of fear of change or to protect us. Usually, it's strangers who encourage us to move toward our transformation. So we end up putting others' needs first by listening to them. And if you can't seem to get where you want to go, it's because you're being influenced by others.
The Wake-Up Call That Changed Everything
Over the past few months, between my mother's illness, my father's, and the death of my uncle, I realized I had forgotten myself. I feel like I'm in an airport watching everyone else move forward while I'm standing still. Every time I tried to think about myself, guilt would creep in, along with my family's judgment, and I gradually forgot that life is beautiful and that I have the right to live for myself, no matter what others think. It's my own fault for staying in the role of a little girl waiting for permission to live, to dare, and to go all in on her life.
In reality, I was giving power to others instead of setting boundaries, just simply saying, "No, this is too much for me", because I was afraid of being less loved, or afraid of losing control over what I could still manage in my daily life. When we want to change, we don't know what's waiting on the other side. But we slowly drown just because we're afraid of disappointing others or being alone.
Why Learning How to Stop Being Influenced by Others Is Your Superpower?
The truth is, when you master how to stop being influenced by others, you're not becoming cold or heartless. You're becoming powerful. You're reclaiming the energy you've been bleeding out to everyone else's opinions, fears, and limitations. And honey, that energy? That's your rocket fuel for building the empire you've been dreaming about.
To get out of that mental prison, there's a trend that's come back into fashion: stepping into your "villain era" or your "bad bitch era." I want that for you, to be able to say no without guilt, to finally put yourself first. But what people don't tell you is that it's not just about saying no, if it were that easy, everyone would do it. You have to be convinced that it's the right thing to do, and above all, you must not believe you're being mean. You're simply drawing a boundary to be yourself and assert yourself.
The Psychology Behind Why We Seek Validation (And How to Challenge Yourself to Break Free)
The first thing is to understand why you need this validation, are you afraid of disappointing others? Afraid of failure? Or of being judged? Understanding how to stop being influenced by others starts with understanding your own patterns. When you learn how to challenge yourself to dig deeper into these fears, you realize most of them are illusions.
But you can live with that fear and still attract people who will take advantage of you and keep you playing small. Take this example: you want to create content or launch that YouTube channel. But before even writing anything, you feel the need to double-check your facts, you doubt your tips, and in the end, you make content that sounds like everyone else's, because you're afraid of haters. Or worse, you don't create it at all.
This is exactly what happens when you haven't learned how to stop being influenced by others. Your unique voice gets diluted by the noise of everyone else's expectations and fears.
The Real Strategy: How to Challenge Yourself Beyond Surface-Level Changes
When you truly understand how to challenge yourself, you realize it's not about becoming aggressive or mean. It's about becoming discerning. When you know how to stop being influenced by others, you develop an internal compass that guides your decisions based on your values, not your fears.
Think about the most successful female entrepreneurs you admire. They didn't get there by people-pleasing their way to the top. They learned how to challenge yourself means questioning every "should" that society throws at you. Furthermore, they mastered how to stop being influenced by others while still maintaining genuine connections.
Your Action Plan: From Influence Victim to Influence Master
Another key step is taking action:
The goal is to make yourself a priority, starting your day by thinking about you. Forget your parents, your kids, your husband or partner for a moment, and focus at least two hours a day on yourself and your projects. That way, you'll have energy for yourself, not just excuses about why you don't have energy for others.
When you practice how to challenge yourself daily, you build the muscle of self-trust. Each time you choose your vision over someone else's fear, you strengthen your ability to recognize how to stop being influenced by others in real-time.
Learn to say no. Think about building a legacy. Stop living life on autopilot.
The Compound Effect of Boundary Setting
The magic happens when you realize that learning how to stop being influenced by others isn't a one-time decision, it's a daily practice. Every morning when you wake up, you get to choose: Will I live according to my vision today, or will I let other people's fears dictate my choices?
When you consistently practice how to challenge yourself to make decisions from your authentic self rather than your people-pleasing self, something incredible happens. You start attracting opportunities that align with who you actually are, not who you think you should be.
Your Permission Slip to Be Unapologetically You
Right now, someone is waiting for your unique contribution to the world. Your specific combination of experiences, insights, and perspectives can't be replicated by anyone else. But if you keep letting others influence your decisions, that contribution stays locked inside you.
Mastering how to stop being influenced by others doesn't mean you stop caring about people or become selfish. It means you care about yourself enough to show up authentically, which ultimately serves everyone better. When you know how to challenge yourself to act from alignment rather than approval-seeking, you give others permission to do the same.
The woman who learns how to stop being influenced by others becomes a force of nature. She builds businesses that matter, creates content that resonates, and lives a life that inspires others to do the same.
That woman is you. She's been waiting patiently for you to remember who you are beneath all those layers of other people's expectations. Now go claim what's yours.
Your New Reality Starts Now
Stop waiting for permission. Stop asking for validation. Stop shrinking to make others comfortable. The world doesn't need another watered-down version of who you think you should be, it needs the full, unapologetic, authentic you.
When you finally master how to stop being influenced by others, you'll look back at this moment and realize it was the turning point. The moment you decided to stop being a supporting character in your own life story and stepped into the starring role you were always meant to play.
Your dreams aren't too big. Your vision isn't unrealistic. Your standards aren't too high. What's unrealistic is expecting to build an extraordinary life while living by ordinary people's rules and limitations.
So tomorrow morning, when you wake up and feel that familiar pull to check everyone else's needs before your own, remember this: You have one life. One shot at building something that matters. One opportunity to show the world what you're really capable of when you stop playing small.
The question isn't whether you're ready to learn how to challenge yourself and break free from others' influence. The question is: What are you going to do with all that power once you reclaim it?
Your empire is waiting. Your authentic voice is ready to be heard. Your unapologetic life is calling your name.
XOXO
